1. |
Oblivion
03:20
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they called me out and i deserved every bit of it
so i stepped out, stepped outside for a cigarette
i exhaled my problems out into space, the atmosphere
until it's clogged up with the shit that i choose to ignore
they told me so and i just didn't wanna know
thought i was cool, it turns out i am a criminal
and i projected all my fear of other people onto them
and made them feel like they were the guilty ones
and we exhale our problems out into space, oblivion
until it's clogged up with the shit we all choose to ignore
guilt weighs on me, it feels like the weight of eternity
just want something or someone to take this life from me
let me be a bodiless spirit form instead of this
cause i am drowning in the pain that i cause for myself
let me float out into space, the atmosphere, oblivion
until my spirit is the shape of what we choose to ignore
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2. |
Ophelia
03:50
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ophelia, chaos reigns inside you
the reason that i always felt some love for you
you're like a drug i can take at any time
you put my mind in a different space and you used to be mine
but now i see you at her side
and there ain't much spark left in your smile
i want you to know i still care
i want you to know i've been there
i want you to know that you can be free
just like me
ophelia, on all fours, does our chores
stays for free in exchange for better days
spent on nothing much at all, we can't leave home
so why not get high, she says, but after a while
my head is spinning in the clouds
and i'm frostbitten from the snow
i want you to know i still care
i want you to know i'll be there
i want you to know i'm fading out
right about now
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3. |
Turned Inside
03:21
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there is someone who lingers around
keeps you happy while i'm out of town
though i'd usually respond with rage
this is how this arrangement's been made
hear you laughing in the other room
hear you fucking from morning til noon
all this noise is just bringing me down
oh i wish i could leave right now
it's all too much to bear, the paranoid exorcisms inside my mind
i will die a thousand times to find the littlest crime
and burn you for it
what's wrong with me?
i hear voices inside of these songs
keep me humming as they sing along
adding messages pulled out of air
it's like they're almost not there but they are
i need medicine but there's no hospitals
i need prescriptions but there's no doctors
i need out, i need out, i need freedom
but there's nothing free in this state, in this town
no there's nothing free in this state, in this town
it's all too much to bear, the paranoid exorcisms inside my mind
i will die a thousand times to find the littlest crime
and burn you for it
what's wrong with me?
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4. |
Health
03:09
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health is something that i don't have much of these days
i just put things in my body to feel different ways
something to stay awake
something to fall asleep
something to make me escape
so i can dream
health is something that i don't have much of a handle on
i just pick up things up as i walk and i wander along
something to keep me awake
something to fall asleep
something to make me escape
so i can dream
and i won't abide by anyone's rules but my own
it's my body after all, yeah
health is something that i don't have much of these days
i just put things in my body to feel different ways
something to stay awake
something to fall asleep
something to make me escape
so i can dream
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5. |
#1 Destroyer Fan
05:09
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i met you at a support group
caught your eye across the room
we took a break and shared a laugh
then we sat together in the back
we talked about your favorite bands
#1 destroyer fan
your parents had abandoned you
but you did the best you could do
later on, we got it on
to your favorite destroyer song
everything was new to you
and it seemed like it scared you, too
purple, white, grey, black flag
hung above where we were fags
a chasm forming in your head
the last time i saw your bed
later on, you texted me
some overwrought apology
thinking you had done me wrong
cause we hadn't talked for so long
i still recall the time and place
the distinct features of your face
but the one thing i just cannot place
is i can't remember your name
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6. |
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i daydream of holding you
gripping every curve that i once knew
finding some sense of comfort
some relief from all the shit that i've been up to
and in the dark, we'd make our case
to each other and we'd work it on out
breathe in tongues and speak in unison
as our bodies change, the world changes around us
as our bodies change, the world changes around us
the world, it never stops
the last time we really connected
it was a vicious night and boy, do i remember it
i felt your voice ache through your body
and it echoed round the room and broke me in
and in the dark, we'd make our case
to each other and we'd work it on out
pushing against the grain with everything we had
as our bodies change, the world changes around us
as our bodies change, the world changes around us
there's no love left in this world
and it makes itself known
and it does with every step
it's wretched and abused and it's tired and it's sad
but what can we do? what can we do? what can we do?
what can we do? what can we do?
as our bodies change, the world changes around us
as our bodies change, the world changes around us
as our bodies change, the world changes around us
as our bodies change, the world changes around us
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7. |
Audrey
06:30
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you took your piercings out
tied your heart to a post
let it wash over your body
let the feelings go
and become someone i used to know
become someone i used to know
become someone i used to know
i held it somewhere near
couldn't face the day without it there
it always haunted you
the feelings you could never repair
and now you're just a friend who isn't there
now you're just a friend who isn't there
now you're just a friend who isn't there anymore
you've become someone i used to know
you've become someone i used to know
yeah you've become someone i used to know
we hadn't talked in quite some time
for what it's worth i need you now
i read about it yesterday
and the feeling that i felt was shame
somehow wish it was me in the frame
and instead it was you who was saved
there's only fate to blame for this
yeah there's only fate to blame for this
yeah there's only fate to blame for this mess
and now you're just someone i used to know
you've become someone i used to know
you've become someone i used to know
we hadn't talked in quite some time
for what it's worth i need you now
we hadn't talked in a lifetime
for what it's worth i miss you now
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8. |
Stranded Living Room
06:54
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broken arm kid, tears running down your face
you cradle yourself alone against your pain
what will you do with the kids laughing at you
when you're 24 and their laughter still follows you
down a path of pain
it gets hard to take, your very bad reasons
for behavior you break in on the weekends
and no one's looking, so you might as well do it
don't matter what you did as long as you're into it
and it feels like home
i don't see you anymore, though you live in this house
i guess everything i touch gets broken somehow
i guess i don't deserve anything fragile
but i don't want anything broken
so i stay alone
but you gotta live free and you gotta buy drugs
the world's hard to beat, so you beat yourself up
in your stranded living room, no one's there to stop you
just do what you do and no one will come after you
you can run in peace
(run)
what will i do now that trouble's all i see
and i've got no more love down the road for me
and my bank account is empty permanently
and my self worth is running, running, running, running, running
down your ex's drain
all i feel is pain
pain, pain, pain, pain, pain
there's times that you made mistakes
times that you made mistakes
well don't you mean every day
don't you mean every day
cause i fuck up everything
i fuck up everything
yeah i fuck up everything
yeah i fuck up everything
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9. |
Save Up
04:37
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time moves slow when you've got nowhere to go
nothing to do, nothing to look forward to
there she goes, blasting the radio
i guess i'll call a friend, they're just around the bend
save up all year and buy your tickets
only to find the show's been cancelled
and we don't know when it's coming back
i patiently wait, you've kept me at the gate
nowhere to go but down to a new low
you're having your fun, but don't you know you can't save it up
you better spend it while you can
forget about the pain, forget about it while you still can
save up your tears and bide your time
only to find the sadness keeps coming back
and we don't know when it's gonna stop
you save up all year and buy your tickets
only to find the show's been cancelled
and we don't know when it's coming back
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10. |
Please Talk to Me
07:17
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if you were here now i think that you'd say
nothing at all or you'd just walk away
maybe you'd tell me that i'm just the worst
but don't you know that just hurts
why can't anyone just act like their age
something i never thought that i would say
but i'm so lonely and trying to cope
and it all just feels like a joke to me now
what's the point of acting cool and being called great
when you can't get out of bed for the same reasons
it's fine just surviving but i'd rather be dying, oh
won't you please talk to me?
if you were clear now i think that you'd say
something about how you're feeling today
ways that i've hurt you and ways that i'm wrong
maybe you'd write a good song about it
but you'd rather hide in your hedonist hole
and pout like a baby with no self control
now i've got these cravings, i'm feeling so used
god, i made a mistake when i told you i loved you
what's the point of acting cool and being called great
when you can't get out of bed for the same reasons
it's fine just surviving but i'd rather be dying, oh
won't you please talk to me?
i'm sick of these verses i write about you
and all of the immature things that you do
i wish i could say it all straight to your face
you know i usually don't act this way
but you've got me stuck in this frustrating place
there's no more fighting, just silence all day
and though i feel gaslit, abandoned, and used
i'd be lying if i said i didn't miss you
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11. |
Danger Decides
05:39
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well you're the one connection to her i have left
i can smell her on your back and on the nape of your neck
it's getting hard to leave, yeah it's getting hard to leave this time
and every single time that we had chatted before
you always seemed like you were such a fucking bore
and i guess it hasn't changed, the only thing that's changed
is i'm not sharing her no more
cause i showed her to the door
and it's a wild thing to get used to
and it doesn't matter it's you
but what kind of message is that
that i just needed love that bad
well you get what you've asked for
you get what you've asked for
and i cannot abide by any rules, no matter how logical
and i think that i am gonna discover
why there's rules in the first place
cause i decided to try everything that i can find
i've got a new lease on life, danger decides
you're the one connection to her i have left
and it's obvious the reason that i'm in your bed
her hair is in your shower, her essence is everywhere
i'm disconnected from the words you say to me
i'm climbing up the stairs inside a burning building
i'm losing reasons for it as i start healing
so what will i do with you
little baby pink and blue
well i just needed someone to get used to
and it didn't matter it's you
but what kind of message is that
that i just needed love that bad
well you get what you've asked for
you get what you've asked for
and i cannot abide by any rules, no matter how logical
and i think that i am gonna discover
why there's rules in the first place
cause i decided to try everything that i can find
i've got a new lease on life, danger decides
decides what he's asking for this time
and now everything that i say
is shrouded in shades of grey
cause there's not a lot left to get used to
and i guess it mattered it's you
but what kind of message is that
that i needed love just that bad
well i get what i asked for
i get what i've asked for
and i cannot abide by any rules, no matter how logical
and i think that i am gonna discover
why there's rules in the first place
cause i decided to try everything that i can find
i've got a new lease on life, danger decides
yeah i've got a new lease on life, danger decides
right now
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12. |
The Best Enemies
04:26
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we were destined to be the best enemies
at each other's throats
til the other one chokes the other one out
and leaves her on the floor
it's meat for the children
they're playing around
you can hear the sound
they play with their pets
watch as they fall down
you can hear the sound
watch them fall, watch them fall
into bed with each other
and we were destined to call each other home
for a short time before our short-sighted security measures
were proven to be weak
there's rust on these chains, too easy to break
well i skinned my knee
won't you help me please
instead of falling with me
yeah i skinned my knee
won't you help me please
instead of falling with me
it's meat for the children
they're playing around
you can hear the sound
they play with their pets
watch them fall down
you can hear the sound
watch them fall, watch them fall
into bed with each other
cause we were destined to be the best enemies
at each other's throats
til the other one chokes the other one out
and leaves her on the floor
it's meat for the children
they're playing around
you can hear the sound
as they play with their pets
watch them fall down
you'll hear the sound
watch them fall, watch them fall, watch them fall
into bed with each other
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Shaylee recommends:
friend
by i know who you are and you are nothing
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Charts/Memories
by DEAD NAME BLUES
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Ugh. Maita. You had me at "You Sure Can Kill A Sunday, Pt. II". SWOON. This album is one of the best albums of 2022.
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